Pamela Quiery Parent Coach
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#061 Three big reasons you get angry - and none of them are your fault

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In this week’s episode I talk about why parenting is so hard in this modern culture we live in and the three biggest reasons why I believe we get angry and lose it with our kids. 

When we are feeling calm, patient and well-resourced, when all our needs are taken care of, when we have no worries, we have no stresses, at those times parenting is easy. 

We know how to be loving, kind, respectful and patient towards our kids. 

We can take the time to listen to them. We can see things from their side. We can be deeply empathic of their experience - and of course when we are in that place, parenting goes really well. 
So our number one mission as parents is to take care of ourselves, make sure our needs are met, make sure we are well resourced and our nervous systems are feeling calm and regulated so we can take care of our children. 

The thing is that there is a lot that gets in the way of that: 

So today I want to talk about the three biggest reasons we get angry with out kids. 

And I’m talking about the bigger picture here. Yes, on the surface we might blame our kids for us getting angry - if only they would clean up after themselves or listen to me without arguing, if only they’d get ready in the mornings without me asking them a million times, then I wouldn’t lose it with them. 

But what I’m arguing today is that there are bigger reasons at play as to why we get to that point of arguing with our kids, why we get into the power struggles and arguments, why we run out of patience so quickly. Because when we approach these situations calmly, unruffled, with lots of empathy, they usually resolve themselves or go much better.

So there are 3 things that make it hard for us to deal with our children in kind, compassionate ways when they’re struggling. They are:

  1. Current stresses
  2. Unmet needs
  3. Unresolved trauma

If you would love to learn how to bring these ideas into your parenting to making a lasting shift in your child's behaviour and your relationship with them, I am launching my new course very soon "The Shouting Solution: how to stay calm in the chaos so you can parent peacefully". Stay tuned for more info coming very soon. 
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I would love to stay in touch! You can follow me on Facebook and Instagram @PamParentCoach. I always love to hear from my listeners.

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Pamela Quiery Parent Coach
Providing local services in Belfast, Northern Ireland and online around the world.
☎ +44 7450203275
​hello@pamtheparentcoach.com
  • Home
  • About
  • Parent Masterclass
  • Peaceful Parent School
  • The Screen Time Solution
  • Podcast
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Testimonials
  • FAQs