Hi, I’m Pamela!
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pamela quiery parent coach | gentle & science-informed support
I guide overwhelmed parents toward calmer, more connected family lives using gentle, science-informed coaching.
I’ve trained in hand in hand Parenting and Compassionate Inquiry. i draw on neuroscience, including Polyvagal Theory and interpersonal neurobiology, to deeply understand what drives behaviour both in children and in ourselves.
my story
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I’m from Belfast, a proud mum of two and still a messy, imperfect parent, navigating the ups and downs of each phase. Learning respectful and neuro-aware parenting tools helped me move from emotional overwhelm to more playful connection. Now, I walk alongside other parents with practical tools, lots of heart, and buckets of real-world experience. |
my approach & credentials
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Compassionate Inquiry: A trauma-aware approach based on the work of Dr Gabor Mate, helps uncover the emotional roots of behaviour. I have completed the year-long training and I am working towards becoming a certified Compassionate Inquiry Practitioner in the mentorship program.
Neuroscience: Informed by Interpersonal Neurobiology and Polyvagal Theory, I offer tools for parents to regulate their nervous systems and foster connection. Public Health & Behaviour Change: Master’s degree with expertise in how relationships, environments, and brains shape parenting—and how small shifts can transform family life. Hand in Hand Parenting Instructor (certified since 2020): a parenting approach grounded in connection and listening, with a playful twist. |
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why this matters
Being a calm, attuned parent isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up, understanding what’s below challenging behaviour, and choosing presence over reactivity. You have everything you need; I’m here to help you see it more clearly.
My Parenting Journey
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My two amazing children are my best teachers. Every. Single. Day. With their help, I am always growing, making mistakes, learning and healing. Parenting for me is both a joy and a constant challenge. I am constantly motivated to do my own healing work in order to be able to show up for my children. There are many days when things go wrong, where I get frustrated and lose my cool. But I am so much less reactive than I was when I first became a parent. I have the tools to navigate the inevitable challenges that life sends our way. It often looks messy, but I know I have my ‘tote bag’ of practices and strategies to guide me back to being a calm and capable parent. |
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How I went from shouty mum to playful mum...
I spent years of my parenting journey trying to figure out what I was getting wrong, why parenting was so hard and why I found it so challenging. I highly valued being a responsive and respectful parent but my old patterns were getting in the way. I was often impatient and angry despite my best efforts to stay calm and in control.
Then I discovered the Hand in Hand Parenting approach. I connected with like-minded parents and found the tools and strategies I needed to parent my children in a respectful way whilst doing my own inner healing work. It brings me great joy to bring what I learned to the hundreds of parents I have worked with. I would love to connect with you and hear more about your parenting journey.
Then I discovered the Hand in Hand Parenting approach. I connected with like-minded parents and found the tools and strategies I needed to parent my children in a respectful way whilst doing my own inner healing work. It brings me great joy to bring what I learned to the hundreds of parents I have worked with. I would love to connect with you and hear more about your parenting journey.
how i can help you
join my free masterclass and finally get your kids to listen!In this 60-minute live session, you’ll discover compassionate strategies to respond to your child’s feelings without power struggles. Learn how to stay calm and connected even during the toughest moments.
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peaceful parent school: AN 8 WEEK GROUP PROGRAMA supportive group coaching program designed to help you transform daily parenting challenges into opportunities for connection and cooperation. Over weeks, you’ll gain practical tools and confidence to parent peacefully and respectfully.
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listen to my podcast: how to parent peacefullyJoin me as I share with you five simple tools for a more peaceful, playful home. If you’re ready to enjoy raising your children by creating a peaceful home where kids want to cooperate and you keep your cool, you’re in the right place.
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