How should you respond when your child tells you “I hate myself”?
Your sweet child who you love more than life itself. Who you have poured your love and attention on since they were so small. Who you’ve supported through the happy times and life’s challenges.
You want the best for them, you want them to be happy.
So these words coming from their lips can be devastating.
Often our ‘auto-parent response’ might be to talk them out of it, to reassure them, to tell them not to be so silly or to react harshly, telling them not to think those thoughts.
What a child needs at this moment is to be heard and understood. To know you are there to listen without judgement (even if you feel like dying inside).
So take a breath and put your auto-parent response on hold if you can.
Try saying “I’d love to hear more” or “I’d love to hear what makes you feel that way”.
Offer your presence, your love and your connection.
They need to feel safe enough to share their worries with you. Here’s what you can do:
Connection is more important than ever as your child moves through the Tween years.
To get some support and fresh ideas around supporting your child through the Tween years, join my workshop this Saturday 11th September at 10am UK time.
Pamela works with parents, supporting them as they strive to raise conscious, respectful children.